Where do I start

Monday, October 30, 2006

Great Weekend with a few concerns

Hello allllllllllll...yup I bet from my greeting you all can tell I am happy. I must say I had a great Thursday - Sunday. I connected with the "League of Extraordinary single men", met up with Suelene, experienced God move on my behalf, made new friends and so much more... I'll try breaking everything into various posts in the coming week but I'll give y'all snippets ... I also have a concern or rather a need to vent but I'll reserve that for another post as this is suppose to be a post of joy!

For one reason or another, the league of extraordinary single men weren't complete this weekend ...AGAIN!!! A few things came up and I only got to hear from two but either way it was a smashing weekend. Peeps complained about my location and the cold...so next week, i'll be flying out to meet and celebrate "great news" with the crew..I'll fill y'all in on the "great news" after meeting with my crew.

I must say I am fortunate and blessed to have the friends I have... I have been through a lot these past few weeks...a few have opened my eyes to the wiles of men. So it was refreshing to be around friends who constantly remind you of who you are, your standards and what you mean to them...I sat this weekend with my friends and we totally cracked up on our various gists, what I had experienced and what I was going through...Its funny for the first time in a few weeks I went to bed feeling fulfilled...fulfilled because I was validated... validated by people who truly know me ... I got some heavy knocks though (I am the youngest member of this club)and peeps took advantage of me by yabbing the lights out of me... I mean one of my friends yabbed me so bad, it sent me straight to bed (I mention this because I am extremely sarcastic and my yabbies have been known to leave peeps in P.O.P). Anyway In the next few days I'll break down this weekends visit, gist and activities.

Suelene Update

I met up with Suelene the other night to discuss our situation. I must say I feel at peace knowing that I was able to resolve this amicably (most times when I get frustrated by people and their actions I find it easier to just avoid them because in some cases they never seem to see their wrong). Anyway so I met up with Suelene and we spoke about the state of things...I thank God for the part of me that troubles me when I meet certain people...Because until I feel peace in that part of me, I always know theres something amiss about the person...Anyway we got to talk about our values and we discovered we have totally different values...I strongly believe in God and ascribe all that I am to Him...Suelene on the other hand isn't absolute that God exists. So ladies and gentlemen that ends that but I must say I got a chance to evangelize and I thoroughly enjoyed the time and the sharing...I dont expect her to change her beliefs automatically based on our conversation but I believe that I have sown a seed..a seed that the Holy Spirit will germinate in due time. Anyway I got to learn about a religious sect called the Christian Science (not Scientology)...its amazing the different things people believe in...anyway Suelene will be leaving my group and I totally respect that but at least I know if and when we see, there will be no uncomfortable feelings. I also got to learn something new about myself from our meeting (it shows you can never know everything about you...regardless of age). Anyway we have an on-going bet...we'll ski-race in december and if she beats me, then I have to take her to dinner when we return in the spring...Man I am going to Ski like a possessed man.

God loves me

My advice to anyone reading this blog is...be mindful of what you pray for...for when God answers your prayers, HE ANSWERS THEM. I mean I have a testimony in the works...God showed me that the events of the past few weeks have been to teach me about an area in my life I need to work on and be more mindful of... I am learning and a testimony is on its way!

New friends

I think from my posts, its clear I dont believe in having too many friends but this weekend I was introduced to a new friend... Let me say just meeting this person and talking to her, I am proud to be a Nigerian...the things shes involved in will blow your mind and she's just 23. She made it to my church today, which was equally impressive anyway I'll invite her to post some of her work on my blog...I truly believe she'll go places.


I am tired of men/women who go around blaming the other party for why things didnt work out between them. He/she is no good, he/she did this, he/she did that...if you've had a good guy/gal and you messed things up, tell your friends when they ask .."It wasn't his/her fault...I messed up" ...don't go around blaming the guy/gal for your issues, thinking that the guy/gal will never get to hear about it...we live in a very small world...news travels fast... I'll continue to advise those faced with a situation like this to keep their calm...never disrespect him/her, regardless of what he/she says whether true or false...the truth is those that really matter will take the time out to know you for themselves and those that choose to believe the garbage they hear aren't worth your time (How many of you have noticed that when you meet a new guy or girl and you ask them about their past relationships, they always blame the other party for why things failed...its never your fault...you are always the victim...my people if you come across these type folks, my advice is runnnnn...if you are so good but everyone you meet seems to hurt you, then I am tempted to say either they all belong to a club specially created to destroy you or it might be high time for you to re-assess yourself) It's funny how people run their mouths thinking it will never get back to the other party....well NEWSFLASHHHH ...it does!
I plan to blog extensively about this in the coming days... Will also touch on the art of friendship ... be mindful who you call a friend or friends... some friends hang around you to laugh at your sorrow...some are soooo dumb that even when they are being used as pawns their movement is so predictable ...lol...gossips! I remember what my mum told me once... If you hurt one of your fingers, the other four will feel the pain...cause they are all guilty by association. When I see two people that I realize are clearly not friends, I normally feel tempted to walk up to them and really tear into them...why the pretense?...hmmm come to think of it I guess since they've opened the door I might as well walk in boldly...like a friend usually says " I think its time people know their place"! ...lol ...hah ahahahahah hahah ha ahahaha ..its my turn to laugh.

Anyway enough venting.. I hope you all had a swell weekend...mine was... until my next posts, Love like you've never loved before, trust like you've never trusted before for if you truly believe that God orders your steps, then the success or failure of any relationship has nothing to do with you but with what God has purposed for you.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

An Open letter to my mother

I remember the day I left Nigeria... My mother sat beside me crying her eyes off but couldn't understand why I wasn't crying. Wasn't I going to miss her? Miss my siblings? Wasn't I scared of the unknown? It's funny cause as I sit here typing this, it feels like it happened yesterday. I tried crying but I couldn't cry... Not because of the jargon I hear some guys say (Men are not suppose to cry... Why? Cause we are made of metal?)... Oh Please give me a break!

I didn't cry because I knew my going away was just for a short while. Days have gone by, Months have turned into years, I have had enough time to see and learn about the world, enough time to get as much classroom education as one possibly can...Enough time to learn how to struggle and build an empire from the ground up, the struggle and the pain... I saw an episode of Survivor and laughed...Put a Nigerian on each episode and trust me there will only be one outcome...A Nigerian winner each time....Man we are survivors!

Anyway back to my main gist. An open letter to my mother

This is an open letter to you mum,
Where would I have been without you
At six I felt you were the most wicked woman the world could ever know
As I progressed in age, your spanking style changed with time
At times I truly felt I was switched at birth
Then I thought you beat me due to my close resemblance to my dad
At fourteen you beat me for the errors my younger siblings made
At fourteen I ran away ... away from you in the hope that the world out there will be more receptive and loving of me. After a few hours of my temporary madness, I returned home.
Hoping for a heroes welcome, I instead got the beating of my life. Ouch! My back still remembers the pain...My lips still remember the slap...My brain asked "where is my real mother?"
I am now grown... I have been through this world, like many others, I have had my share of happiness and disappointments, my heart has been broken and I must say I have broken a few myself, I have seen the wickedness of men and I have also seen the goodness of men; I have changed and many have as well. But your words remain, they ring in my ears...They have more meaning now...It's funny how years ago when you'd wake me up in the middle of the night to talk to me...Tell me I was now your "man"...How I needed to step up to the plate...How my younger siblings were watching and following in my foot steps..I thought your pep talks were crap but I am thankful to God I listened...I attribute the good in me to you and the bad to the choices I have made.
My dear mother...I remember how in an effort to ensure we got the best education, you were reduced to having three skirts and shoes with uneven heels, your white blouse had turned brown due to hard water and our inability to afford proper detergent...I remember the night your friend asked "why deprive yourself of so much?" and you replied "they are the reason I live" I remember that night I went to bed crying...crying for all the stupid things I had done... Remembering how selfish a person I was..Failing to realize your struggle..Still stealing from you in order to hang with the joneses ...Damn you Suya man!!!... Oh how stubborn I was; so stubborn that friends told you ..."You have a better chance investing in the other kids cause this one isn't going to make it!"...I remember your laughter and response " What a joke...I named him and he is going to be great!!!" Well mum, lets just say we are moving on up. Thank you for seeing my abilities even before I realized them...thank you for seeing my potential even before I saw them... thank you for believing in my dreams even when the world called me Joseph, thank you for trusting that I had a plan even when at times from my look you knew I was confused... Thank you for being you..For through your strength I built my courage and through your confidence in me, mine was born. I remember a song that used to play on the radio... I remember how I really wanted to dedicate it to you...Today I have a chance to and though its not sung, but the words still ring...How I wish you were right here with me so we could dance like we used to...Trust me no more "I am a grown man!" the next time I fly down, we are going to dance again..So bring out those new soles cause I plan to take you down memory lane...Enjoy your song

Sweet Mother, I no go forget you
for this suffer wey you suffer for me ooo
Sweet mother -r-r-r
Sweet mother ooo -ewooo
If I no chop my mother no go chop
If I no sleep my mother no go sleep
She no dey tire ooo sweet mother sweet mother

It's funny and amazing how even now these things still hold true. I love you mum...
I love you for the woman you chose to be as a young girl
I love you for the woman you were as I grew up
I love you for the woman you are today
Thank you for revealing to me the joy of the Lord

Your son,

I'll leave you guys with this link http://howtoprankatelemarketer.ytmnd.com/ ... Enjoy!

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Watching From Afar!!!

"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two. - Captain Corelli's Mandolin

I felt the above quote would be most appropriate for this post. How are you all doing? I am in some serious pain...I took a road trip to Indiana for a game of paintball with my friends and as I settle in to type this post, I am really sore... does anyone have ROB? No one?
Oh well on to the gist at hand…this past week was really interesting for me...I have found new respect for women. As I post this gist, I am still baffled and shocked at the turn of events... let's just say the best way to describe my state is one of shock and confusion. I am hoping at the end of this post, folks won’t only enjoy the gist but learn from it and proffer help.

Sometime in May, I had a conversation with one of my pastors in church who also happens to be my mentor. We tend to meet up every now and then to catch up on the going-ons in my life, spiritually, educationally, career wise, socially and emotionally. During this particular meeting, we spoke of my "state of singleness" and the need to address it. During our conversation, he asked if I was open to dating women of other colors and nationality and I told him I really was determined to marry a naija babe. Anyway he advised that I keep my mind open and not box myself because the best woman for me might not be Nigerian and by boxing myself, I could be delaying my blessing.In May, this conversation was just that a conversation because I got up from there determined more than ever to marry a Nigerian. Well five months later, I am still determined to marry a Nigerian but I can't ignore an encounter this past week.

The story starts a few weeks back though I must say I only understood my role this week.Anyway a few weeks ago, I attended a meeting and after the meeting, I walked past this babe...lets call her Suelene (I just like the name). I noticed she gave me a funny look but like me I took notice but thought nothing of it...a few days after that, I walked into another meeting and lo and behold, who was there? Yup...if your answer was Martha, you are WRONG but if you said Suelene, you can give yourself a pat on the back! So after this meeting she walked up to where I was sitting and introduced herself..."Hi my name is Suelene, I have seen you around campus but we've never spoken"...hey Suelene, my name is Miguel and I must say other than a few days ago, this will be the second time I've seen you on campus (We both belong to different sections and our sections haven't really had a chance to mingle)Anyway we have our little chat, filled with "nothing" and she leaves; I get to meet some other folks...apparently while I wasn’t paying attention, the person leading the meeting had asked people to go around and meet someone new".

Two weeks ago, there’s another event away from campus and I rolled up there... after hanging there with my mates for a few minutes, this babe walks in with her friends...as they walk past us, a wink, a smile and a nod were exchanged. Immediately they were out of sight, trusting guys to quickly assess and deliver their assessments even when it isn't sought after, one of the guys in my group goes "dude isn't she hot? Sad thing is I hear she might be gay"... the second dude goes…"makes sense cause a buddy of mine has tried several times to go out on a date with her and she's turned him down and apparently a couple of other guys as well". I have to make mention of this at this juncture...for the life of me, I never knew the things white guys appreciate in women (physically) differ from the things black guys appreciate in women! Anyway after getting this revelation, I decided it was time to leave.

Fast forward to this week-

Well this week I get an email from a strange name, requesting to meet up with me to discuss career options and my summer internship. I typed the name in the student directory to see who the student was and to my surprise, it was Suelene. Anyway I arranged to meet Suelene the following day.

Next day comes and I meet Suelene...as we chat about my summer experience, she starts to giggle...Ok at this point I am wondering to myself…"What in the world is funny about working through a weekend?" ... so I asked if everything was okay and she answered yes. Anyway I turned the table around and asked about her experience...while sharing she spoke about the fact that she couldn't get a gig (job) in a certain state which she really wanted and so ended up in a different state and despite the fact the company was nice, she was missing something. From there our conversation spread into our class mate... a number of which had either come back from the summer pregnant, engaged, new babies or in the case of one strange guy, married (without inviting his mates...shame on you dude!). Anyway she expressed shock as to the tide of things and i agreed cos man one babe came back "knocked up" and the babes eating habit in class has been rather annoying... I mean this babe eats. All of a sudden she drops the words..." I hear you are not open to inter-racial relationships that you are determined to marry not even a black person but a Nigerian...what is this fascination with Nigerian girls?" ... shocked I asked her "who told you that?" (I only shared that with one babe in my school and hearing it from a babe I never knew existed until a few weeks back, was jaw-dropping)…anyway I confirmed what she had heard and briefly explained my reasons. I noticed after that comment that conversation wasn't fluid anymore so I begged to take my leave.

Next day, one of my boys (who was at the event off-campus) saw me and was like" Suelene came by class to look for you (Yes! people I cut class...man prepping for interviews is a class on its own!)... Thinking nothing of it, I continued with my daily business... that evening I got a call on my cell phone from a strange area-code...It was Suelene..."Hey Miguel are you in your building?"..."yup" ..."do you have a few minutes to spare? “Sure”. I’ll meet you downstairs".Anyway I head downstairs and a few minutes later Suelene joins me... she apologized for the other day…which for me was confusing..."oh why are you apologizing?"...
Suelene: “I sometimes allow my emotions get the best of me"
Miguel (in an attempt to make her feel better) "don't we all"
(My people! with those words na so I take open door to drama)
Suelene: Do you really think so?
Miguel: (confused at this point)...Yeah! (Trying to sound philosophical and intellectual) every action we take is laden has some emotional undertone. The struggle is striking the right balance to ensure we are conveying the right message at the right time and in the right frame.
Suelene: It's interesting you say that because my room-mate totally agrees. Our emotions have a time frame within which we are afforded a chance to act or react in order to make or alter a situation.
(My people! at this point even the English wey dey my head jus jam!)

Anyway Suelene goes on to tell me when she first saw me on campus...how one of our mutual black friends had told her I don't date outside my race and as such it delayed her telling me what she was about to tell me... to cut this long gist short jare...the babe asked if I’ll be open to an inter-racial relationship on any grounds...again I told my dear Suelene that I was only interested in dating Nigerians as more than likely the next relationship I get into could be lead to the altar. Well from nowhere, I got a verbal uppercut .." its sad how the world speaks of compassion, tolerance and integration, when the people that are being trained as leaders of tomorrow still hold on to myopic views that perpetuate intolerance and segregation".
(I have received yabs in my lifetime but nothing like this!).
Anyway I told her that in the search of compassion and tolerance a person does not necessarily have to negate their desire(s).

How about the next day "American Gbeborun" (the girl I confided in) sends me a message on Skype asking where I was in the school building... lets call her AG. Anyway I meet up with AG and as I hammer her on why she felt the need to run her mouth, the babe tells me that apparently for some time now Suelene has had a thing for me but she tried to dissuade her especially with the attention other guys were willing to give her; anyway she just felt the need (As per Gbeborun) to meet up with me and tell me that the babe is shy but that she really likes me and that I should think about it before making a decision.

I just discovered that Suelene is in one of the groups i signed up to work with this fall. We have 5 weeks to go this quarter and this group plans to meet twice a week. BUMMER!!!
What do would you do?
1. It's a voluntary group, so I could ask to be excluded (she'll think its because of her....hmmm)
2. Ignore her and act like nothing happened and nothing was said?
3. Confront her and lay it out straight that nothing can transpire between the two of you? (keeping in mind she didn’t directly ask)
4. If a babe has been that patient and focused on you, despite the fact you never noticed her, start a friendship and see where things develop from there (but there are certain fears with this option, like "Why encourage something you know you are not open to)Let me know your thoughts!

In other news, The League of Extraordinary Single Men (will blog about them someday) will be storming my abode next week. This is the first time in years that we'll all be together in the same place at one time after many years. Activities that we indulge in include but are not limited to
a) Yab each other as per our singleness
b) Yab each other as per our singleness
c) Compare notes (I like this part... for some strange reason this leads to greater bonding)
d) Propose drafting a letter to INS...gist of letter will be reduce inflow of Nigerian men, increase inflow of Nigerian babes and increase outflow (through whatever means) of Nigerian men already in the country.

In a few weeks I'll experience my last fall ball in this school and like the first; it could be a solo expedition AGAIN!!! Thanks to Three 6 Mafia I can verbally sum up the way I feel when I say IT'S HARD OUT THERE FOR A PIMP!

Note: Too tired to go through and make the necessary changes to spelling or grammatical error. If you find a few please bare with me...My Garri is rising out of control and it's my last bowl!!!

Wednesday, October 18, 2006


Ok so my plan was to post some juicy gist over the weekend but Oga mi (Bijou) tagged me... so here goes...

1. M&A Associate
2. Real Estate Investor
3. Floor Technician - Cleaner
4. Banker

1. Fashion model
2. Movie Actor
3. Politician
4. King maker

1. Brown Sugar
2. Best Man
3. Cassablanca
4. Tyler Perry's Madea (anyone of his stage productions...i love them all)

1. Lagos
2. Atlanta
3. Chicago
4. London

1. 24
2. Law & Order (SVU)
3. CSI
4. CNN

1. Singapore
2. Maldives
3. Paris
4. Dubai

1. Blogger to do my blog rounds
2. CNN
3. Soccernet
4. Nigeriaworld

1. Ewa Agoyin with really soft plantain
2. Pounded yam with Egusi soup
3. Fried rice/Jolloff rice
4. Soft Plantain with anything even Eba

1. Fish, Octopus, Crab, shark, Whale, snake, dog, human beings
2. Olives
3. Mushroom
4. Broccoli

1. Mama Calabar’s jolloff rice
2. Qaato’s Egusi without the fish
3. Plantain, Plantain, plantain did I say plantain?
4. Cranberry juice, no ice

1. Bed
2. Book cases (I love reading)
3. Clothes (May God deliver me)
4. Work desk

1. A wife
2. More closet space
3. Therapeutic bed
4. Hardwood floors

1. A Blue sweater
2. White t-shirt
3. Flared jeans
4. wrist watch

1. In heaven
2. With “Her” (My wife)
3. Church
4. Nigeria

1. In Zamunda
2. A NEPA free Nigeria
3. the perfect church

1. God
2. With “Her”
3. Jack Welch
4. Warren Buffet
5. My blog Pals

1. My next interview
2. Where to move to next
3. Who is she and where is she
4. I need to update my blog

1. Clothes
2. Houses
3. Cars
4. Shoes

1. I am a scrabble junkie
2. Very sarcastic and blunt
3. I love to danceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
4. I'd rather be on my couch at home reading a good book with music playing in the background than going out

1. 3T
2. Ms. May
3. Mosaicone
4. Life of a stranger called me

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

It's well....

Guys i realize i need to update my blog... sorry for the long absence... i have been extremely busy and will remain busy for a couple of days but promise to give y'all correct gist by weekend.

Hope everyone is doing good.......

Thursday, October 05, 2006

EFCC bust Nigerian 419 scammers

I say fire ! fire!! fire!!!

Monday, October 02, 2006

What a summer!

I was going to post about things I experienced this summer (in detail)...But as I started to write, I realized I was giving the devil praise...Glorifying his actions by spreading it and remaining down (actually came close to shutting down this blog)...So rather than do that, I'll just say this summer was trying for me from a relationship I enjoyed, to lies, to so-called friends showing their true colors, to people back biting each other just in order to gain attention, to my accident, my awful boss in need of 24/7 breath-freshener machine, to my house getting burnt, the drama as a result of that, to falling sick and then finally hearing about the death of feferity... The devil thought he had me cornered...Oh! What a joker...Haven't you heard..Cause my anointed no harm!
Yes I may fall but I am glad the bible states that a righteousness falleth 7 times but he gets back up! devil I am up and its onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

As I work to getting back to my previous self and clearing my head, I'll be guest blogging on Miss Bijou's site...Topic " A good man and a Godly man" I promise it will be an interesting and revealing read.

I'll leave a short word for you guys...Those of you going through one thing or the other...Yes you may have sinned and departed from the presence of God but the Lord hasn't given up on you..Remember he created you in His image...He is mindful of you:

Everyday the devil comes in through one door
Everyday we determine within ourselves that for so long as we do good and live right things will work out
Everyday we sin and the devil sits there and laughs
we go about telling God how big our problems are when in actual fact we should be telling our problems how big our God is...But how can we? When we are so ashamed to turn to God because of our sins...The devil smiles at this..Why? Because he expects the shame you are experiencing will keep you away from your creator...But my brethren its a new dayyyyyyyyyy
God said to Job (Job 38)
"Who is this who darkens counsel by words without knowledge?
Now prepare yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me.
Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?
Tell me, if you have understanding.
Who determined its measurements? Surely you Know!
or who stretched the line upon it?
To what were its foundations fastened?
or who laid its conerstone, when morning stars sang together,
and all the sons of God shouted for joy?
Or who shut in the sea with doors,
when it burst forth and issued from the womb;
when I made the clouds its garment,
And thick darkness its swaddling band;
When I fixed My limit for it,
And set bars and doors;
When I said,
'This far you may come, but no farther, And here your proud waves must stop!'
Have you commanded the morning since your days began,
And caused the dawn to know its place,
That it might take hold of the ends of the earth,
And the wicked(the devil and his principalities) be shaken out of it?

This morning I take total command....devil you've got nothing on me...He that is in me is greater than you...Remember he created you...Throw your worst and I'll still be standing...I serve your master ... I am his son!

Anyway I'll leave now...A new week has started... They told me last week I was done... my career is suppose to be over... but God has told me something new today...I blame no one... This was a weeding period for me....Its time to harvest...Someone get me my tractor!

Remain Blessed!