Where do I start

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Inter-tribal dating/Marriages

Yes!!! I am going to write about it! I realize we all have varied opinions on this topic but my aim is to use this medium to express mine. Some will definitely kick against my point of view and I welcome that debate but I am sincerely hoping that after reading this, people will be more open minded and hopefully in some small way, we'll start to see a change in this world we live in..particularly my dear country Nigeria.

So I have heard pretty interesting arguments about why people should marry from within their tribe. Some have even backed it up with the bible, while some have used the success of certain marriages as an example of why they hold so strongly to this belief. Others have spoken about the need to hold on to their heritage and culture...My response? No wonder why we have such a high rate of marriages falling apart... a good number within the first year!!! Scary stuff! So where do I start??? hmmm!

You ask a number of men and women what they are looking for in a partner. For most people, they'll start with "I want a born again/God fearing ......" and just before that settles in, as if in the same breath, they go "He/she has to be ........ (fill in your choice Yoruba, Hausa, Igbo etc). For a number of years, I've tried to understand the thinking behind this...the excuses I have listed above are some of the common ones I've gotten.

People remind me how much has changed in the world and the thinking that it is easier to marry and relate with someone who speaks the same language as you and understands your culture. Some go as far as claiming it worked well for our parents and it's understandable why the same is expected of them....my response? Cockroach poopoo! Firstly, In the days of our parents, the reason why most people preferred their sons and daughters marry within their tribe was because it was easier to carry out a thorough check on the person and his/her family. These days with the ease of getting information, it is easy to find out about any family. Furthermore, I argue that the marriages of our parents were "successful" (if success is based on length of time together and willingness to see it through) because they knew how to persevere. Women were willing to endure so much, sadly some were physically and verbally abused, cheated on but they remained because they figured divorce was a taboo. Secondly, these days a lot of people speak more than language...I am not from one of the major tribes but speak and understand two of the three major languages. So my point is those reasons are shallow at best.

Now to the group that tend to use the bible to defend their decision. They tend to use the story of Isaac and Rebekah (Genesis 24: 1-66). A very interesting read about how Abraham sent his trusted messenger to his hometown to seek a wife for Isaac. It is funny how people read this passage and immediately jump to the conclusion that this supports their claim. Abraham sent his messenger to his hometown because he didn't want Isaac marrying a pagan. God had sent him to the land he was in (Canaan) to possess it. His reason for seeking a wife from his people wasn't because he wanted Isaac to marry from his village. So this doesn't support your thinking.
The second passage is the one commonly thrown around about not"being unequally/unevenly yoked" that's where they stop but forget it says "do not be unevenly/unequally yoked with UNBELIEVERS" it has nothing to do with your tribe rather has more to do with your belief. In other words, Paul wasn't too thrilled about inter-belief marriages. Sadly, even a majority of believers that know this word, still insist on marrying people from their tribe. They act shocked when things fall apart...So what we find is even the Christian marriages that are suppose to be an example to the world are actually no different from the other marriages that we see fall apart.

How can you say you desire God's best for you when you insist on telling God who you want to marry? I am sorry but it doesn't work that way! I sincerely believe that one of the major reasons we are currently experiencing a spike in divorce amongst young couples is because of their failure to prioritize correctly. Away from the craze of decisions based on material possessions, some actually desire someone from their tribe over the need to marry a god fearing person. A couple of years ago, I attended a singles fellowship in one of the renowned churches in Lagos. At some point during the meeting, the men were separated from the women. So as the men gathered to talk, a good looking chap raised his hands to share with the group. He mentioned how his father was a prominent member of the church, how he had found the girl he wanted to share the rest of his life with but how his father had kicked against it, demanding he marry a girl from his tribe...so sad! I don't know what the guy decided but if he followed his dad's advice, I can only believe there is someone out there married to his second choice and not the person he truly desires. Second instance, a boy I've been mentoring in church finally opened up to me about his "love life"...he shared with me how a couple (both leaders in the church) were against him dating/marrying their daughter because he was of a different tribe...at first I thought it was a joke until another guy in the church made the same complaint about the same issue with the same couple but over a different daughter.

I am not an advocate of disobeying parents but marriage isn't an institution to enter into lightly or based on the preferences of your parents....Yes if there is a tangible reason why they are against your marrying someone from a different tribe, I advice you listen but if the only reason lies in the fact he is from a different tribe, kindly inform them that it wasn't his/her choice...he/she was born into that family...had absolutely nothing to do with his preference.

Listen to the cries of people who entered into a marriage based on tribe...the stories I hear are scary... Love isn't easy...so when you find someone that is madly in love with you, pray, get the confirmation from God...worry about what names your children will answer later...trust me it won't matter to them if they are in a broken or violent home...if all else fails, be like my parents and give the child an English name.

Till I write again, may love find you when you least expect and in the place you least expect...May the color of love be that color God has designed for you and may the language be that language God has purposed for you.... In Jesus Name. Amen!!!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Mugufied: what next?

Welcome to a day in the life of a mugu. When it comes to matters pertaining to relationships, the opposite sex or friends, I've been called naive and a few times innocent but for the first time last night, a friend (lets call her the Gemini mother) called me a mugu!!! Please readers help me judge if in fact I am a certified mugu or not...having asked this of you, if after reading this you feel the need to call me a name worse than "mugu", kindly remember I am the victim here (yes I am pulling out the victim card).

Here goes:

There is a certain lady I've known for the most part of my life and I'm sure I've blogged about her in the past (can't be bothered to search now) but for the purpose of this gist I'll call her 'chooka'.

I don't want to bore you with how we met, blah, blah, blah but we met about 20 years ago. We have always liked ourselves and people have constantly teased us about how good we would be together and the believe we'll end up with each other. She knows me better than any other girl...knows my strengths and weaknesses and generally how to handle me (yes! I can be a handful).
Anyway for a number of years we avoided the thought and talk of dating, until 2004. In 2004, I was in a relationship and was thinking of taking it to the next level. While trying to make a decision on whether to take it to the next level or not, I had cause to make a stop in chooka's city. I met up with chooka and decided share my intentions with her and to my surprise chooka wasn't thrilled about my plans. She felt we owed it to ourselves, since we knew each other so well, to explore a relationship. To cut the long story short, a month or two later, after a lot of reflection, I couldn't help agreeing with her. As good as my current relationship was, the lady didn't understand me quite like chooka. On my return to base, I noticed we started having a lot of arguments (when I think back now, I can't help but think I was the cause of most of the arguments)
I started dating Chooka and while we were dating, she gained admission into a school in a different country. We continued dating despite the distance and she continued sharing her words of undying love. Months into her program, I had cause to visit Atlanta for a friend's party. While at that party, I met a couple of ladies who were school mates of Chooka. As expected, I asked if they knew her and to my excitement they did. One went on to share some news that left me dazed..."Yeah I know her...Her fiance lives here in Atlanta..He actually spent a quarter with her in XXX"...Fiance? spent a quarter??? I had never been to that country before, we weren't engaged,so it clearly wasn't me. Waited for Chooka to return before bringing up the topic and she claimed her ex came to see her, to beg her to return to him but was there for just a couple of days. I refused to believe she could be lying and as such I accepted her explanation (some time later, I got confirmation that in fact he actually lived with her in school for a couple of months). A few months later I decided to break things off because I noticed certain inconsistencies but never brought up the fact I got confirmation from some one else.
So you might ask, what does this have to do with me being called a mugu..right? Well last year she made a reappearance. She claimed to still be in love with me, she claimed to have been single and was still dealing with our separation...Asked her if she was seeing anyone at the time she said no. She kept bombarding me with messages and for some reason or the other, my instincts kept telling me to avoid her...so I did. She went cold for a few months and five days ago, she appeared again. This time she called me with a local number. I was shocked she was around and couldn't understand what had brought her to town. She came over to see me...Again, she went on about how she hasn't been with anyone, how they tried hooking her up with some chap and how she wasn't feeling the chap and was avoiding the chap...how she has kept herself ...blah blah blah! While having this conversation and while she's trying to prove that I am all she wants, she claimed to have a picture of me...she took up her blackberry and started searching for the picture...as she searched, my eye caught a naked picture of her....confused, I asked why she had a naked picture of herself and she said "I enjoy taking them and just looking at myself" as she continued scrolling, I noticed a folder tagged "my baby" the folder picture was also a naked picture. Again baffled I asked to see it but she said no I couldn't. She proceeded to show me some of my pictures but refused to allow me hold the phone or scroll through myself...This I found weird. Anyway, a couple of hours later, she picked up my phone and started scrolling through and I figured this was a good time to make my move...So I picked up her phone and decided to scroll through as well....Immediately she noticed, she screamed and started chasing me about to get the phone off me...At this point I had gotten to pictures of herself naked and lo and behold pictures of a naked guy as well...recent pictures...What didn't my eyes see... I must say the shock left me speechless and all I could do was get her a ride and all I could say was "womennnnnnn!" I love you has become "good morning"....at times you say it but most times you don't mean it!

On a different tangent, I have a question and would love to hear from y'all....Do you believe a relationship can stand the test of time, if a couple desists from having sex before marriage?

Please note: if you discover typos it's because I can't be bothered to go through and make the necessary corrections...nothing against you but just that I am still weak!

Tuesday, June 07, 2011

No title

I typically have a title for what I am going to write but today is different. Different for many reasons but I'll focus on one in particular. Over the years, I've heard people say it's easy to give advice than to take, it's easy to judge when you are not the one experiencing it and it's easier said than done...These words have been used under various circumstances and situations but for the most part when it pertains to a relationship.

So currently going through that period where you realize a relationship you were in, that you hoped would be your last, is gradually coming to an end and you clearly have no control over the outcome. I must confess it is tough! I can now understand what a couple of you who have written me while going through a similar fate were feeling. You are torn, can't believe this person who sang about how much they love you, vowed to go through 'thick and thin' with you, who you've forgiven their indiscretion on more than one occasion, could now be the one to pull the plug without a thought about how you feel but I have a pill for you, which I will also swallow....There is always tomorrow and someone will come along who would rock your world!
Yes! I am not just psyching myself! I sincerely believe it! Folks ask if God is still in the business of answering prayers and my answer is a definite and resounding YES! He is! You might not see it as you go through this period but if you continue to remember what His word says "For I know the thoughts I have towards you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a FUTURE and a hope" Jeremiah 29:11...You will realize that He works everything for your own good. Yes I said for your own good. You wonder how a God that loves you can allow you go through so much heart ache? Where he expects you to start from after you've given so much to this relationship. I say to you what I say to myself...if you believe the God you serve or know He is a fair and loving God, be assured that the greater the pain you feel, the sweeter your testimony will be when He finally brings the person He has created just for you.

So while you wait to see His next move, keep believing that tomorrow will definitely be better than today...for all you know this person currently breaking up with you might be your tomorrow but a better version. At times, there has to be a separation for a realization to occur...from that realization, education is gained and from that education, a better bond/relationship is built. For all you know, the one God has created for you, might be that friend who leads you out of this period, might be someone lingering around you...For all you know, your tomorrow is here...Wake up! lift your head up and walk into your destiny.

Pray for me as I pray for you. Love is a great thing. I am in love with love and I enjoy being in love with love and will forever love.

Tee lady, I am sure you expected to read something different but this is the kettle currently on the stove. I promise to return with that post.

Until my return, I pray that the God that created us, will bless us, keep us and comfort those of us that need comforting. I pray that He continues to reveal His goodness to us and that we see reason to give Him thanks daily. I pray that He that started a work in us will be faithful to complete it and that our unfaithfulness at certain times will not be held against us. I pray that the best of your today, will be the worst of your tomorrow and that your life and desires be fulfilled according to His purpose and plans for you. In Jesus Name! Amen!

Sunday, May 15, 2011

A New Page

OK so I know some of you have a ton of questions...is he really coming out of retirement? Will he stay this time or run away after a couple of posts? Well for the time being I am back and I plan to be more consistent with my posts. Having said that I've also decided to use this blog to address a couple of questions/messages I get in regards to relationships. For those of you who don't know how to contact me, feel free to reach me via email at spicymiguel@gmail.com

So today, I want to revive something I wrote at the start of the year. I've chosen to put it up now because I find that a number of discussions I've had of late surrounding relationships have to do with things I have addressed in this post. Please read, enjoy and as always, feel free to comment.

I figured I write about something that would renew the hope and vigor some of us so badly need. This post will focus mainly on the women as I've found that giving this advice to men is like forcing a horse to drink water...It won't happen! I sincerely believe that men only change when they come to that decision on their own. A man chooses to settle down when he is ready, he chooses to be faithful when he is ready...As sad as it may sound, the truth is, you can't prep a man to change. So today, I'll focus on how women can turn a new page in this coming year. If you follow and adopt my suggestions below, I can almost guarantee you better results this year in terms of seeking, building and staying in a relationship.

1. Queen

You are the best of your make, created by God. Unlike that stunning dress by Vera Wang or the nice pair of Manolos, there are no two people like you. No one can make or recreate anyone close to you. You are unique! You are the best version ever made. You are a queen and in this coming year, you should determine that you'll firstly, treat yourself as a queen and secondly not tolerate or permit anyone treating you less. We spend a lot of time allowing people judge us, we allow them dictate to us how we should think, clothes we should wear, who we should associate with, how we should feel and who to feel for and how we should behave (yes, yes, yes I am doing just that...I knoooow!!!)...Your worth isn't the value another places on you but rather the value you place on yourself. Don't believe the crap people say "all men are cheats", "there are no more gentlemen out there" etc. There is a man out there who will worship you, there is a man out there who might not have been trained to open doors for ladies or pull out chairs but will do it to keep you happy. There is also a man out there who won’t feel the need to cheat on you. I am sure they exist because I can boast of a couple.
So in this new year, if your man or toaster isn't wooing you the way a man should woo a lady or treating you the way a queen should be treated, demand for it. Ask that he opens your door; ask that he pulls out your chair.

2. Core principles

To sincerely have someone treat you as the queen stated above, you need to know who you are and be convinced that you deserve to be treated that way. Tons of women are settling. They are settling because someone, somewhere has told them in order to find a man, they need to. I agree in some cases we need to compromise...ever walked into a house you are looking to buy or rent, notice how they never seem to have all you desire...they probably have a nice kitchen but the layout of the bathroom isn't so great. You need to sit back and figure out what really matters to you in a relationship. Write them down! What are those things you are willing to compromise on...not what society has asked you to accept but rather that which you are willing to swallow because what is good for the goose isn't always good for the gander. I recently had cause to speak to a lady who is in her late 20s...the conversation got to the question of virginity and holding out and she told me how at her age it was no longer fashionable to be a virgin, no longer fashionable to hold out...fashionable??? Her fear was it would either drive a guy away or encourage him to cheat. My response was RUBBISH!!! A guy will cheat on you if he wants to cheat on you regardless! What restrains a guy from cheating on you is respect, self control and the fear of God. A man that truly desires to be with you would respect your stance. When you realize what your core principles are, who you are as a person, those things you can stand and those you can't stand in a relationship or qualities you want in a guy, it makes it a lot easier sifting through the pile of dung our society is filled with these days. Having said that, it’s important to state here also that if the qualities you seek in a man are looks, build, wealth and social status ahead of integrity, character & upbringing, what you get would probably not bring you happiness.

3. Get to know ME

I find that a lot of ladies claim to know themselves well but when you speak with them for a few minutes, you come away knowing clearly they have no clue who they really are or what it is they desire. They go whichever way the wind blows. Men are born to be warriors, they are chief strategists when it comes to hunting (I refuse to say woo because for most it’s not their intention) the ladies. The only way you can sift to find a man right for you, is by taking the time to know YOURSELF! I struggle with women, who find it hard to be a lone or feel the need to always surround themselves with toasters. Not every man that asks for your number DESERVES your number! Spend some time alone, enjoy your own company, discover yourself, what drives you and what interests you. That way when a joker comes along, you are able to spot him within the shortest amount of time.

I had cause to introduce a friend I had known for about 18 years to a woman I was considering. For some weeks I had struggled internally with my choice. I couldn’t place a finger as to why. Now after their first meeting, my friend felt she was a nice lady but figured it would take spending some more time with her to realize the cause of my concerns. So the next opportunity I had, I invited him over and left both of them to talk. After a few minutes, I returned to join the conversation. Immediately I heard what the conversation was about, it became apparent to me what my issues were with the lady. I sought my friend’s view and he said something that made me laugh on one hand, but hit me on the other. He said he has always known me to like ‘kati-kati’ girls…I’ll try defining ‘kati-kati’- all artificial, no substance. Not that the ladies have been dull…nooo but they lacked certain qualities important to relate with someone with a background such as mine. I must say, when I took some time to weigh what he had said, I found that I’ve only truly had one relationship that I felt fulfilled in.

4. Time is not yours

Some ladies meet a guy today and before the guy says two words they’ve already thought about how the wedding is going to be, what type of baby pram they are going to buy. If you are one of these ladies…you know yourselves!!! Check yourself! Learn to control that flesh called your heart. I hear ladies say “but I couldn’t help it” OH YES YOU CAN! It’s called self control. No doubt the man might check all the boxes you desire in a partner but never neglect the time of discovery. It reveals a lot and if you have been careful enough to observe and make some notes, it will spare you some serious heartbreak down the road.

I constantly disagree with married women or men who complain about certain attitudes or practices they see in their spouses post-wedding/ post-start of a relationship. They claim these attitudes were generated post-wedding/ post-start of a relationship… In the words of Zebrudaya, fa fa fa foul! These signs have always been there, you failed to take advantage of the discovery period. You allowed your emotions go on overdrive, that day he playfully pushed you and you almost fell wasn’t a joke but a sign…that day she pulled your ears and it hurt wasn’t out of affection but a sign. We all display certain signs that speak to who we are. How many of you watch the TV series LIE TO ME? You should!

I realize there is so much pressure in our society for ladies to get married but I ask that you consider the points I’ve made above. You deserve to be happy with whomever you’ve chosen to give your heart to and it can be difficult to weed through, decode the game guys play but I sincerely believe if you forget the societal, cultural and peer pressure and understand that time is in the hands of God and determine to wait for the right person, you will live a truly fulfilling life. Yesterday I heard about a couple of women in their 40s who gave birth to their first kids. With God, nothing is ever late…it is always right on time.

I am tired of women living below their full potential. Some women limit their aspirations for fear that most men will be too scared to approach them. I say if a man is scared to approach you because you are successful or have done well for yourself, that isn’t the man for you. Do you want to live a life of mediocrity? Be all you can be, buy that car, live in that house, take that job…The right man won’t be threatened by your success but will provide you a spring board to reach greater heights.

5. Better late than wrong

I am determined above all else to have a successful marriage with God fearing, well brought up, disciplined and content kids. I can tell you without a doubt NOTHING compares with having a loving marriage…I attained a certain level of success in my life but I constantly feel empty when I look at the marriage of one particular friend. The love they display is second to none and before you think it is a mirror, I lived with this couple for about a year. You can only pretend for so long. After my experience with this couple, I decided that regardless of how long it was going to take, I was going to wait on God to provide me with the woman He has created for me. Yes I am increasing in age, Yes folks are wondering what if anything is wrong with me and why I’m not settled, my mother is calling practically every week for an update…I refuse to be moved! I know myself and I know what I desire…I am not looking for a perfect woman, since the last I checked I am not perfect but I am looking for a woman I would wake up every day delighted to make happy. I am looking for a woman, who would make a great mother…I am looking for my God appointed and anointed wife. Time means nothing to me. I’d rather be late to marry, than sorry I did.

Thursday, October 07, 2010

Thinking of coming out of retirement

So I am thinking of coming out of retirement. It has been two whole years (good grief! how time flies!!!). Life has been great! I've learn't a lot, seen a lot and heard enough! Should I return? Hmmmm ...

Thursday, October 02, 2008

God loves me!

I am alive today because of the love God has for me. I take a lot of things for granted at times but after my experience this past Saturday/Sunday, my words will mean more and my actions a lot more from this day forth. I feel blessed that God in His infinite goodness and mercy, has chosen to keep me alive and as I live, I'll continue to seek His purpose for my life, continue to work towards satisfying that which He has called me to be and accomplish. Below is my testimony:

On Saturday, I got a call from the driver asking if I planned on going out. With no destination in mind but eager to go out, after spending most of the week dealing with one meeting or another, I asked him to pick me up. When the driver showed up, he had this look on his face, his eyes looked strange...At first, I thought nothing of it but as he drove me within the estate, I noticed a certain boldness within him that he hadn't displayed through the period we've worked together...Rather than referring to me as "Oga" as he usually does, he was referring to me as "Big bros", constantly raising his voice as he spoke to me or answered my questions ...At this point, I asked him to drop me at home and return for me later in the day...When he called back later in the day to pick me up, my spirit said I shouldn't go anywhere...I must say this was really tough for me because I was wayyy too bored, with practically nothing to do in the house, staying home wasn't appealing but I went ahead and told him I'd be staying in for the night. I asked that he pick me up for church the next day and he went on his way.
The next morning, I called to confirm he was on his way to pick me up for church...At first I got no answer...I tried his number again and finally got an answer...the driver had been involved in an accident Saturday night...the car had summersaulted three times but he survived with cuts. As I sat back in shock, it hit me...It should have been apparent to me on Saturday...his sudden boldness, the look on his face, his eyes etc...the driver was high.

Who knows what would have happened if he had picked me up that night? I normally sit in the back with no seat belt on...I am convinced more than ever, that God speaks to His beloved and I am thankful that for once I listened.

I realize I said I'd put up a post on Faith but I couldn't put off this testimony. I pray that God speaks to you all in ways that you'll listen, understand and know it's Him speaking, in Jesus name. Amen.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Andrew no check out ooo!!!

So I've been gone like forever and only a hand full of people have asked after me...What rubbish!!! Where is the love that we share...What happened to for better or for worse...I thought this was a marriage...I the writer and you the readers vow never to separate but to support each other through thick and thin. Oh well at least now I know not to feel bad and not to rush to post to keep you guys entertained.

So as some of you know, have heard or have seen (which ever be the the case), I've relocated to Nigeria. Yes my motherland...if America be the land of milk and honey, Nigeria is the land of dreams and dreamers. I mean there is no other country in the world, where you go to sleep with 1,000 Naira (local currency) and wake up the next day with over 100 Million Naira. Anyway prior to this visit, my last trip to Nigeria was about 15 years as such you know the remainder of this post is going to be filled with certain things some of you (frequent travelers or Nigerian residents) may find as commonplace but those of us that have been gone for a while will have a good laugh at.

So prior to landing in Nigeria, the company had made hotel and transportation arrangements for me. I was told I'd be staying in a first-class hotel (I should have known there was something amiss when they used first class rather than 5-star to describe the hotel). I'll skip the ride from the airport to the "hotel" because nothing interesting really happened...just the usual shock that welcomes one who has been away for a while. So rather than going into a long spill about what I have experienced so far, I thought it would be more interesting if I list the really interesting ones and in my future post, I'll go into more detail.

1. Ordered white rice, stew and friend chicken from the hotel...Dude brought me boiled chicken, I stated I wanted chicken friend...dude took the food back and brought me burnt chicken..I mean visibly burnt.

2. One of my helps looks at me one morning and goes "Oga it looks like you've machinated"...I go "what did you say?", He replies" Oga you've lost weight".

3. I turn on the generator and everything in the house blows up...TV, Fan etc

4. Stuck in traffic, two okada drivers clash...the guilty party (short dude) , immediately gets up from the ground, sends the innocent party (much taller dude) two quick blows...all of a sudden the innocent party looks guilty. What confused me the most was why he would allow such a short guy bully him that way but my driver said "oga for dis country you no sabi wetin persin dey carry oo...if short man wake up hit big man, big man get to hold back..cause short man fit get backup for pocket"...lol

5. Heading home after a busy day in the office, as we enter into the street where I am currently residing, the Nepa cable above us starts to spark, cuts from the main line and dangles right in front of us...Every house on the street still had light but mine.

6. Remember my TV that blew up? So I get an electrician to look at it..after charging me money, thing still doesn't work...So we call another...finally get to the fourth electrician, he claims to be a "Master" electrician...at this point I am certain he is going to have it sorted out...By the time dude finished with the TV, I had to pay a normal electrician more money to actually make it work.

7. Electrician who had been sent to find parts for the TV, returns and says "Oga We couldn't find the original but we found the equivalent". Okay so how much is the "equivalent?"...Oga the equivalent is more expensive than the original...I couldn't help but laugh...I doubt dude knew the meaning of equivalent because as I grilled him more, he gave in...lol

8. Walk into a restaurant, order some food...told the waitress to tell the chef to add very little pepper in my food...she goes "I got you!" I remind her a second time and she says the same thing "I said I got you!"...Let's just say for two straight days, I had an intimate relationship with restrooms in the office and at home... I can design a restroom in my sleep now.

9. So I have a security guard...dude goes to bed before I go to bed...he sleeps through the day...So I bought touch light and I've been guarding him...He is paid to watch over me but the roles are now reversed.

10. Walk into a dance spot to celebrate a mates bachelor eve...Standing there, a girl walks up to me and grabs my hand (at this point I am thinking to myself....I must be looking real fly)...Next thing I know she starts gyrating in front of me...At this point we figure she's a "lady of the night"...I guess as she's shocked at her inability to arouse me...she turns and goes "Are you angry?" ...I am like why? She goes "Cause you no dey stand"...Forgive the crudeness of this incident but I couldn't help but share...wayyy too funny.

11. In a meeting, talking about diverse things, I notice one guy seems knowledgeable in every area...So I ask him what he does for a living ...dude goes "Everything!".

I'll leave you guys with those for now...It's been fun though...I can't wait to see what today holds...Someone should do "Nigeria's funniest video" it will be a huge hit.

Trust you guys are cool. I heard something interesting and powerful recently. The devil isn't after your money, your health or other material things...think about it...the devil doesn't need money in order to carry out his evil plots/schemes...The devil wants to attack your FAITH...He knows if he can successfully attack your faith in God, he's got you right where he wants you. I'll expand on this one of these days...So When you face trials and tribulation or experience losses that you can't explain, remember what I've said and keep on trusting in God.

PS: If you notice a high amount of mistakes or grammatical errors, please bear with me... I am in Nigeria and every minute I spend making corrections, is time I would have spent charging for them....I love this town!